Hey folks! I am in a list-making mood tonight, so I hope you don’t mind. Here are some things that have been going on in my world since I last updated my little bloggy.
- Work is really busy this week! Some weeks are more hectic than others (as I’m sure if the case with most jobs) and I’m a million times happier when I’m busy and feel productive.
- Grad school…I need to get my act into gear and fill out my application. It’s not even difficult (since I’ve already applied to this program once, and they don’t require GREs) so I just need to set aside an afternoon and DO it.
- Freelance is going well (well, relatively speaking)! I have a potential PR client that I’m going to contact this week because they need help. I just have to figure out exactly what I can offer first…
- I’m going to Bikram yoga tomorrow for the first time! I haven’t done yoga in, oh, forever, so I know I’m going to be awful at it. But I’m looking forward to the challenge. And after yoga, I’m replenishing all that lost sodium by getting sushi with a girlfriend. Mmmm seaweed salad…
- This weekend, Mitch and I are having a Super Bowl party. If you were a reader from the beginning, you may remember our party last year. The one with the multiple televisions (in a small condo, mind you) , including the one positioned FACINF THE BATHROOM so no one has to miss a moment of the game
Aw, I spy a cute doggie! Anyway, I’m not sure about the TV set-up this year (and I assume my readers care even less than I do, haha), but I am planning on bringing back this old friend:
My sangria! (ignore the rest of the booze in the back ok?). I haven’t made it in awhile.
For food, I’m leaning towards simple (read: semi-homemade style) snacks. I want to do some kind of mini sandwiches or sliders but I’m having trouble deciding what to have as the filling…I don’t want burgers so maybe carnitas (store-bought) or ham/cheese, or falafel (from a mix)? Hmmm…
And just to finish off my list with some food/health/fitness type stuff:
- I’m still doing the New Rules of Lifting for Women workouts, three times a week. I feel like I’m getting stronger, however, since I’m still in phase 1, I’m spending a lot less time at the gym than I normally do. The workouts take me about 25 minutes to complete, which feels too short, but I’m trying to be faithful to the program. I decided to keep it up even when I start officially half-marathon training, I just might cut it to 2x per week or something.
- Susan and some other bloggers are calling this month Fatty February and making goals for increasing their (healthy) fat intake. I’m jumping on that bandwagon because I am sick of my painful dry skin, especially on my hands. Whole eggs (instead of whites), more oil and less Pam in cooking, almond/peanut butter, and avocados will be my main fats of choice. Man, the things we do for beauty
- I am making turkey meatloaf right now and it smells SO good. Just had to share.
- I had a bit of an epiphany last weekend, after my date night. (This will be a long bullet). I came home and was unhappy with myself and my “overeating,” mostly in the form of the alcohol and the chips (the rest I “planned for” you know?). I was felt “fat” and frustrated because I haven’t lost the post-holiday (and post-bootcamp) weight I’ve gained, so I feel like a failure and blah blah blah. Now, I often joke that I “waste” so much brain energy thinking about food and weight that I could probably have solved world peace if I focused my thoughts there instead. But here’s what I figured out. I had a pretty rough week last week, with people that I love going through some hard things, with the Haiti situation making me really sad, etc. Big, life-altering things. I realized that stressing about my weight is easier, safer, than thinking about death, destruction, and pain. Being mad at myself is easier than being mad at…I don’t know, G-d? So that’s what I do. I think. Now, that doesn’t exactly change things yet, but I think figuring that out at least is a start.
Whew! Sorry for ending this post on a down note like that. But it was weighing heavily (OMG I’m hilarious) on me so I wanted to share my thoughts and see what you guys think. But if you don’t want to comment on that…tell me what I should put in the sliders this weekend!
I’m off to clean the kitchen I just destroyed and then fold laundry while catching up on the DV-R. I know, I live a thrilling life.
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when things are outa control (in my life or in the world around me) i tend to obsess about the one thing i know i can control – food and how it makes me feel: it’s predictable. just being aware of that can help me put things in perspective and realize where i should be focusing.
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I pray that you grow to realize there is so much more to think about that is good in this world….and to not be angry with God but recognize all the blessings he gives you. Health, loved ones, living in a country that has lots of things taken for granted, etc. It is a practice, but trying to think of all you have to be thankful for regularly is so worth it. It doesn’t have to be think about death or think about feeling badly about yourself. I fully understand desiring control and turning to weight loss as a means for that. But it really is not worth it! Try to turn that frown upside down
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Hallie Reply:
February 4th, 2010 at 6:21 am
Hi Tina, thanks for your comment. I didn’t mean “angry at G-d” in the literal sense (even though I know, that’s what I wrote!), so I really hope I didn’t offend you or anyone else by it. Maybe I should have said “the universe” or something like that. I just meant, something bigger than myself, I guess. I am blessed with many wonderful things and wonderful people in my life and I know that. Last week I got some sad news, on several fronts, about friends and family who mean a lot to me. I have been so lucky so far in my life that when bad things do happen, I don’t aways handle the news as well as I probably should.
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I think what is most important is that you figured it out. Half the battle if figuring out our behavior is actually coming to terms with what is behind it. The other half is making the necessary changes to correct it. Be proud of yourself for actually accepting what is really going on behind the scenes!
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Hallie — i love your list and your epiphany. I hear ya. I wish my own fixation with weight and beauty could be chalked up to me being compassionate and stressed about big problems. unfortunately, i’m just a little OCD and a lot selfish.
As you can see, I, too, have a lot of thinking to do!
xoxo
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Crab cake sliders!
I, too, obsese about food and my weight but you’re right….it’s better than more depressing/upsetting things. At least we can control our food intake! I like being in control!
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I meant “obsess” not “obsese”.
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Yes, I think it is definitely MUCH easier to obsess about our food, exercise and weight than to really get to the bottom of what is bothering us. Our last two posts should go hand in hand, because I think these obsessive thoughts have a lot to do with our own dislike for ourselves. It’s easier to control our body than to learn how to love and appreciate it. That sounds hokey, but I still believe it!
Dude, I’d just skip the buns and have straight up beef patties for the sliders, yum!!
Seriously though, maybe some bbq pulled chicken sliders?
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Well I agree that being mad at yourself is easier than being mad at God, or being in the middle of an Earthquake, HOWEVER, I also have to agree that it’s destructive thinking to beat yourself up over something you can’t do anything about anyway. What was done was done, you can’t go back and change it, you can only do better in the future. Thinking about it and beating yourself up gets you no where, it only creates more stress. Stres leads to over-eating, it’s a vicious cycle.
I hope you can learn how to handle your food issues, and just relax and live in the moment. I’m still working on it myself, so we can help each other out
Have a great time at the SuperBowl party! I wash I could come, even though I hate professional sports, haha. Make a plan and try to stick to it, if you don’t, no need to worry! Just work extra hard the next week.
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Hey Hallie!! I just received my prize package in the mail from you
. Thank you so much!
In regards to this post, I like the list – easy way to get lots of info. across in an easy to read format. And I can see how you were trying to put your own worries into perspective by comparing them with bigger things, but I think that’s even more depressing! I know it’s hard, but try to just forgive yourself for indulging on your date night, and remember that tomorrow is a new day! Just keep trucking along and focus on the positives – ie. what were some good things that you did for yourself and your body that day or even throughout the week.
Take care!
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[...] in my brain this week and I don’t know how to stop it. It’s the kind of stuff I wrote about here and although I wish I could have the healthy relationship with body image that so many others seem [...]